Tyldesley

[scottish]

To be fair to Alan Hansen, any time I've heard him use "We" or "Us", he has been speaking about English football as an entity rather than the England team - which I can take. He's been involved in English football for so long, it is probably now second nature to him.

I forgot to say earlier, I have a distinct recollection from the 2006 World Cup when they showed the studio reaction to an England goal (I forget the actual game) that when Lineker, Lawrenson, professional paid supporter Wrighty and co were shown all (quite naturally) jumping with joy in the studio, Hansen remained firmly seated.

We Scots now have a problem for Sunday - given that Howard Webb has got the final. The entire commentary on whichever part of the English media we are tuned to will be about "our" referee.

So much for my tip of Archundia though I suppose a Spanish-speaking referee might have caused problems with the Dutch (though every Dutch person I've ever met seems able to speak several languages fluently) in terms of neutrality.

You're right of course, and Simon Rice in The Independent has been quick to spot the downsides.

However, as I mentioned previously, that two or three-second gap between satellite and terrestrial TV which means Spanish goals are celebrated in the street before a shot has been struck on BBC/ITV means that I shall watch on Telecinco where, instead of constant wittering on about the referee I shall endure being constantly reminded about how many corners Spain have won, how much more possession they have had and the repeated use of players first names which makes it sound as if they are all personal friends of the commentators.

Alongside the beer adverts which appear under the clock every time there is a stoppage and the repeated cries of 'Vamos España' every time the ball crosses into the Dutch half. These Spanish commentators don't just outshine the Tyldesleys of this world with patriotic bravado, they make Arthur Montford seem positively neutral.

There is though a marvellous informality which would never be seen anywhere in the UK. Here's the Queen of Spain meeting the players in the dressing room after last night's match



I somehow can't quite picture Liz dressed in the national colours exchanging pleasantries with a semmit-clad Craig Gordon in the bowels of Hampden Park.

[scottish]

Actually that pic reminds me of a World Cup Final 'first' that I don't think the papers have spotted. Alongside the first Spanish appearance in the final, the first European winners outside of Europe and the first 'handover' from one European country to another, you can add the first between countries with two reigning monarchs. The 1938 match (Italy v Hungary) was also between two monarchies but Hungary had no reigning monarch, having expelled the Habsburgs at the end of WW1 and the head of state was the loathsome Admiral Horthy - head of a kingdom without a King, and an Admiral without a navy. How very Ruritanian.

It is also the first time any monarchy has been represented in the final since the last appearance of the Dutch in 1978 and the winners will be the fourth with a monarchical head of state - Italy, 1934, 1938 & England, 1966 being the others

So there you are. The first World Cup in Africa, the third of the 21st century, the finalists representing two of the most liberal countries in Europe and what do we find? The first ever final in which the heads of state of both contenders have reached their positions through an accident of birth!

That's progress for you.

[Snuff]

It's just come into my head. During his brief spell of TV over-exposure, before he headed off to Hollywood, did the late Marty Feldman not do a sketch, a sort of parody on David Coleman, about an England football match.

The referee started as "genial Swiss official Herr Somethingorother", then as he gave offsides against and disallowed England goals, the description changed, until he became "this arrogant German fascist, goose-stepping back to the centre circle".

Is this where Tyldesley got his commentating style?

Re Queen Sophia in the dressing room: you might possibly find Mrs Elizabeth Mountbatten-Windsor in the jockey's weighing room, or down the stables - a football dressing room, never.

[Skyline Drifter]

To be fair to Alan Hansen, any time I've heard him use "We" or "Us", he has been speaking about English football as an entity rather than the England team - which I can take. He's been involved in English football for so long, it is probably now second nature to him.

I forgot to say earlier, I have a distinct recollection from the 2006 World Cup when they showed the studio reaction to an England goal (I forget the actual game) that when Lineker, Lawrenson, professional paid supporter Wrighty and co were shown all (quite naturally) jumping with joy in the studio, Hansen remained firmly seated.

Yes, I recall that too. And I think it says a lot more about what Hansen genuinely "feels" than careless use of language does.

[scottish]

It's just come into my head. During his brief spell of TV over-exposure, before he headed off to Hollywood, did the late Marty Feldman not do a sketch, a sort of parody on David Coleman, about an England football match.

Feldman the commentator

Feldman the player

[Snuff]

Thanks David - just watched the clip.

One of young Clive's more-reasoned commentaries I thought.

[scottish]

Germans lose final to Greece